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Tuesday, June 20, 2017

You want to be right or you want to be happy?

I know many have said this, but I think the first time I heard it was years ago on the Dr. Phil show. There is plenty of his wise advice that I agree with, such as, if you didn’t get the love or support you needed as a child, give it to yourself now. Or, being from a broken home is better than living in one.
But the advice, do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?
I have a bit of an issue with this one. By asking this question, it is suggesting that in order to be happy we may be compromising our strong beliefs, our value systems, and our true essence.
I get that a lot of times ego gets in the way. That we think our own point of view is so important and superior that we must express it, and we fight for the listener to understand it.
Now, if this saying applies to simple things in life, like, I thought they used egg noodles in Chow Mein, and your partner is arguing that they use rice noodles, well, you just might want to drop the eye roll and let it go. It’s really not that important. And there are many of these of things that can come up on a daily basis, and it’s best to, as they say on the east coast, “Fuggetaboutit.” But, on the other hand, if it is something that really matters to you, that is a part of your belief system, a part of who you are, and you give in in order to keep the peace, then you are being dishonest to yourself. And you will find that the more you do this, the more it will begin to eat at you.
So, do you want to be someone other than you are?
That is the question that you need to weigh carefully. True health can’t be ours if we are living a lie, if we are not speaking our truth so as not to rock the boat. Because once we start giving in, little by little, letting go for the sake of argument, letting go so that someone else can be right, eventually we will no longer be right or happy.


(Need some help finding your voice? Standing up for yourself? Knowing your worth? Being true to yourself, no apologies necessary? Oh girl, then I've got a program for you!)

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